Georgia Getz

I’ve just returned from my very favorite blogger’s site with some very sad news. Georgia Getz (aka www.iambossy.com) is, hands down, one of the funniest writers I have ever had the pleasure to read. I would put her right up there with the Nora Ephrons, the Erma Bombecks, the Tina Feys. . .
And, like those very funny women, she earns her living writing humor. But, and this is very important so put down your wine before you read this next bit, she is also very different from them because when I write to her, SHE WRITES ME BACK!!!
Oh yeah, she does.

I’ll go on in a moment, but it’s very difficult to write WHILST patting myself on the back. . .Okay—finished.

Apparently Ephron and Fey are way too important and busy patting their own backs to return my calls or to say THANK YOU for all the Edible Arrangements I’ve sent, which are not cheap, by the way. And, yes, I do realize that Bombeck is deceased, but she COULD have her mail forwarded. Am I wrong?

Anyway, what’s done is done. I’ve chosen to just get past it and be the bigger girl. What’s important is that Georgia DOES write back. She is fantastic and very important and, though I hate to admit it, she probably writes back to all of her fans. She’s just that cool. Or at least I thought she was until I saw her post for today.

It wasn’t WHAT she said; it’s HOW she illustrated it. Or, rather, it’s what her ILLUSTRATION said about HER. I ask that you all look back to the top for Exhibit “End of a Bourgeoning Relationship.”

Now mind you, just before I logged onto her site, I’d just been daydreaming about the kick-off to weekend WINE-down, thanks in part to a certain email from SB. As the page loaded and the above picture appeared, I seriously had to look around to see if, in fact, GG was in my cubicle, standing to my posterior, and stealing my very thoughts. And, to make it even creepier, Gabbiano is one of my very FAVES, specifically their Chianti. Yeah, I know. So of course I’m all like, Yep, I knew it, BFF’s forever. Could we BE more alike?

And this is where it gets sad. Move your eyes a little northward on that image and tell me what you see stuffed, ever so politely into the mouth of that bottle. GEORGIA GETZ OWNS A WINE STOPPER. Now, for everyone reading this who knows me, I needn’t say any more. For those who do not know me and are still somewhat confused by my dismay over a common household item, let me extrapolate the true meaning of that seemingly harmless object, in my vocabulary: Stopper=Stop-HER. As in, STOP HER from having EVEN ONE MORE DROP, or STOP HER from pouring it directly down her throat, or, and this is so annoying, STOP HER because she has the bottle again and is running naked through the streets.

It’s such a shame, really. I just can’t be friends with somebody who exhibits that brand of self-restraint. She talks a mean talk in her posts. But, as they say, a picture’s worth a thousand proof— I mean words. The worst part is, I was one tile away from finishing my Entire-Dining-Room-Sized mosaic of “Bossy and Miss Ive Forever.” What a waste of wine bottles. Oh well, it’s nothing a few cases of Gabbiano won’t wash away.

Post Script—If you want to see just how seriously cool Georgia Getz, aka Bossy, is, please click on the comments to this post. And please go read
HER latest post if you are interested in peeing your pants.